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Top 10 Greatest Fictional Horses

August 5, 2010

Source: Stéfan

Y’know what girls like? Horses. And if there’s anything we love more than horses it’s ponies. And if they are rainbow colored and fruit scented? Even better.

As a child of the 80’s, I did indeed play with Little Ponies. I also went to horse camp for a few summers. My sister’s horse obsession was bigger than mine, her bookshelves filled with model horses and unicorns, her notebooks filled with drawings of them. But why do girls love horses?

They are beautiful and graceful animals with long flowing hair begging to be brushed and braided. Beyond that, they represent freedom and power, something girls have historically had limited access to. There’s something fantastic and heroic about riding a horse, and a way to connect with nature and animals, two things girls are almost always drawn to.

But who are the 10 best fictional horses of all time? Forget that Black Beauty and Flicka crap. Our horses can talk, fly, gallop over rainbows, and lead us to the Mines of Moria.

#10 – Bullseye

There have been a number of notable horses in Disney, and I was waffling between them. Philippe from Beauty and the Beast was pretty awesome, as was Mulan‘s powerful horse Khan. But Toy Story‘s Bullseye slides ahead of the herd for being so damn loyal and loveable. He’s more like a puppy than a pony, and he would be difficult for a normal person to ride, but you couldn’t ask for a better equine companion.

#9 – Bree

His full name is Breehy-hinny-brinny-hoohy-hah, and he is is the Horse of The Horse and his Boy, one of the Chronicles of Narnia. He started out as an arrogant, prideful horse, but eventually evolved into a much more humble horse. He and his boy Shasta run away from a life of servitude together and enjoy many adventures in Narnia.

#8 – Bad Horse

Among the shocks at the end of Dr. Horrible’s Sing-Along Blog, the most obvious was the fact that Bad Horse, the leader of the Evil League of Evil, was in fact a horse. His terrible death whinny strikes fear in the hearts of his enemies, and he rules the League with an iron hoof. How a horse has achieved such a status in the crime underworld is impressive, and whenever they get around to the sequel, we want to see what Bad Horse is really capable of.

#7 – The Saw-Horse

When Jack Pumpkinhead found it difficult to keep walking in the Marvelous Land of Oz, Tip/Ozma brought a saw horse to life to carry him. While the others in the party see the Saw-Horse as a unintelligent creature, he is very much the opposite. When Tip is revealed to be the Queen of Oz, the Saw-Horse is outfitted with golden legs and a jeweled saddle. He becomes her personal steed, and is the fastest creature in the Land of Oz. The Saw-Horse is simple but reliable, and fit for a Queen.

#6 – Starlite

Starlite is the talking, singing horse belonging to Rainbow Brite. He has the ability to walk on the rainbows she summons from her color belt. He’s a beautiful horse and he knows it, being a bit vain and foppish. His plush version was one my favorite toys growing up, and to this day I have a hard time believing Starlite is male. Half the time he’s drawn with eyelashes and eyeshadow! But it was the 80’s, kids. It was a crazy time.

#5 – Comet

Supergirls like horses, too. Comet is Supergirl’s horse, infamous for having a really creepy crush on her. The original Comet was once a centaur who communicated with Supergirl telepathically. He can fly, has super strength, and super speed. Additionally, every time a comet passes overhead, he turns human, and weirdly began courting Supergirl. Believe it or not, Post-Crisis Comet is even more bizarre. Bestiality undertones aside, he’s a pretty cool horse to have around.

#4 – Artax

In the novel version of the Neverending Story, Artax actually speaks, and he is the fasted horse in all of Fantasia. The death of Artax remains a traumatic wound in the minds of many kids of my generation. Artax falls victim to the Swamps of Sadness, surrendering himself to his fate, and Atreyu finds the strength to carry on without him.

#3 – Epona

Named after the Celtic goddess of horses, Epona appears first in the Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. She is unique in video game characters because of the bond the players form with her. She needs to be earned in the game, through earning her trust in song and beating her mean owner in a race. You finally free her after a dramatic leap over a large fence, and then she is yours forever.

#2 – Bill the Pony

Compared to others on this list, Bill is unimpressive. He doesn’t fly or talk. He’s an ordinary horse. But humble Bill played an important role in the Fellowship of the Rings. Abused by his master, Bill was set free by Merry and formed a close bond with Samwise Gamgee. The scrawny pony grew stronger and healthier under Sam’s care, and it was a sad moment when they two were forced to part ways at the Mines of Moria. The two were eventually reunited, however, and it was Bill Sam rode to bid Frodo farewell at Grey Havens. Shadowfax may be the most magnificent, but Bill has the most heart.

#1 – Spirit/Swift Wind

Swift Wind is unique in his ability to transform from a normal horse (Spirit) into a unicorn pegasus! (That’s why he is on this list while other unicorn/pegasus are left off.) After Princess Adora gains the ability to transform into She-Ra, Spirit gains the power of speech, and when transformed into Swift Wind, he gains the power of flight, telepathy, incredible speed, and superior strength. Swift Wind is the ultimate in little girl horse wish fulfillment.

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5 Comments leave one →
  1. Kat permalink
    August 6, 2010 10:34 pm

    I would add the Skin Horse from The Velveteen Rabbit to that list.

    “What is REAL?” asked the Rabbit one day, when they were lying side by side near the nursery fender, before Nana came to tidy the room. “Does it mean having things that buzz inside you and a stick-out handle?”

    “Real isn’t how you are made,” said the Skin Horse. “It’s a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real.”

    “Does it hurt?” asked the Rabbit.

    “Sometimes,” said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. “When you are Real you don’t mind being hurt.”

    “Does it happen all at once, like being wound up,” he asked, “or bit by bit?”

    “It doesn’t happen all at once,” said the Skin Horse. “You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are Real you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.”

    “I suppose you are real?” said the Rabbit. And then he wished he had not said it, for he thought the Skin Horse might be sensitive. But the Skin Horse only smiled.

    “The Boy’s Uncle made me Real,” he said. “That was a great many years ago; but once you are Real you can’t become unreal again. It lasts for always.”

  2. scandalousmuffin permalink
    August 8, 2010 4:34 pm

    What about Pokey from Gumby?

    • August 11, 2010 11:14 am

      Both awesome. But I had to pick only 10!

  3. Alex permalink
    September 25, 2011 4:38 pm

    I would LOVE to see a Top 20 list 🙂

  4. July 7, 2012 1:10 am

    Cool! ..remember Mr. Ed?

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